“Sometimes I just want to give it all up and become a handsome billionaire.” This is the super-short bio for @badbanana, the handle of the funniest man on Twitter and my Pick of the Week.

An optimist sees a zombie as half alive. A pessimist sees a zombie and says “yep, I knew this would happen.”

If you don’t get outside of Facebook much, you might not know about Twitter. Firstly, you should really get outside of Facebook more often. Secondly, Twitter is a service of posts no more than 140 characters. This limitation is perfect for boring status updates about last night’s pot roast or comedy gold about eye wear.

I wear glasses because I like to dramatically remove them to display anger. It was awkward doing that with contact lenses.

I had a really hard time deciding which @badbanana tweets to post as examples. Many comedians on Twitter experiment, posting “hit or miss” material–later using the “hits,” based on retweets and favorites, in their act. Big names like @JimGaffigan & @RobCorddry don’t test material, rather they find humourus ways to promote their appearances and comment on their personal life. @badbanana has no misses and promotes little. I could take any post at random and be confident that it is a representative slice of hilarity.

I sure buy a lot of alcohol. Hope I’m not a shopaholic.

The man behind the banana is Tim Siedell. Google him and you’ll find that Twitter is his claim to fame, but he is also one of my favorite writers for The Huffington Post. The nice thing about recommending a Twitter feed over the traditional websites I’ve picked thus far, is that you can consume that content as you wish. Follow him on Twitter, like him on Facebook, or subscribe to him and his wit will come to you.

If you like what you see, follow me on Twitter as well. I pride myself on being a pale imitation.

Disclaimer: Any opinions presented in this Pick of the Week are solely those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of the ESO Crew. Comedy is subjective so if you or any members of your family do not find @badbanana funny, that does not mean that you lack any sense of humor. You just lack a good sense of humor.